I ordered some make-up. We might need a lawyer.

My mother is not always the smartest woman in the world. In my family, we usually try to portray her as a ditz, an air head, the one who cannot watch any television show without asking fifty questions because she doesn't understand, and who needs to be reminded that maybe if she stopped talking so much, she'd be able to figure it out.

Recently, my mother fell for a scam. One of those things that is advertised in the Sunday paper in the middle of the real news so that it looks legitimate. The offer was this: Buy rolls of the new nickels for only $20 a roll! Get them now before they're circulated!

The thing about this 'bargain' is that a roll of nickels costs exactly $2. Not $20. But, my mother called the number, gave them her credit card number, and invested in several rolls of these new nickels.

I guess it hit her a few minutes later what she had done because she called my father on his cell phone and said "Jack, I think I did something stupid." Then she cancelled her credit card. She received a letter from the nickel people saying that her credit card did not work, and the whole adventure ended up being yet another story that caused us to laugh at my mother.

The title of this blog stems from another incident in which my mom fell for a scam. She ordered make-up from an ad, make-up she thought cost $50.00. When we arrived home from vacation one summer, there was a box that could have held a dryer on the porch. It was filled with make-up. $500.00 worth of make-up.

My mom looked at my dad and said, "Jack... I ordered some make-up. We might need a lawyer."

I started this blog because I have recently discovered how interesting, hilarious, dysfunctional, and wonderful my family really is, and wanted a place to collect all my memories of them. It's kind of a tribute to the four people (and a few more) who made me, well, me.